When You Don’t Feel God’s Forgiveness

Have you ever thought, “I wish I could go back in time and know then what I know now?” Or maybe it’s more than just being wiser. Maybe the idea of starting fresh appeals to you because you are carrying a load of guilt. Sure, you know that the Bible teaches that God forgives, but you just can’t seem to FEEL God’s forgiveness. Crippled by feelings of shame and unworthiness, you are struggling to find healing from the scars that your own sin has left in your soul. I’ve been there.

There is hope for your burden, dear one. God sent His Son to free us not just from the penalty of our sin, but from the bondage of it. John 8:36 assures us, “If the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.” But how do we move forward to being truly free? How do we get to a point where we feel God has forgiven us? In Psalm 51 David not only receives deliverance from the emotional bondage of his sin, but he also comes forth with a testimony. Friend, your mistakes can be part of your testimony. But Satan doesn’t want you to have that testimony. He wants you to wallow in guilt because silencing your song of freedom is his best chance of crippling your impact on others. So, he continues to whisper lies to keep you chained to your guilt. I encourage you to take your Bible out now and read Psalm 51. Let’s look at the steps that David took in being restored. (For background purposes, you can read about David’s sin of adultery and murder in 2 Samuel chapter 11).

David’s steps of restoration were confession (verses 1-6), cleansing (verses 7-9), creating (verses 10-12), and calling (verses 13-15). First David agreed with God about his sin and truly grieved over the fact that he had done wrong in the eyes of a holy God (Confession).  Next, David asked God to cleanse him. Note that he didn’t try to work for that cleansing. It came from God’s mercy, not David’s efforts (Cleansing). Then, David asked God to help him live a steadfast life by creating a pure heart within him and granting him a willing and obedient spirit (Creating). Friend, ask God to do the same for you. Then believe by faith that you are forgiven. Clean. Fresh. Verse 7 declares, “Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.” You can start fresh. You can be clean before God, because God’s plan has always been forgiveness.

David revels in the fact that God was faithful to restore to him the joy of his salvation. Would you like to have the same joy that you experienced the moment after receiving the gift of salvation? That excitement and wonder at God’s grace can flood your soul again. And that is what leads to David’s last step- his Calling. David celebrates in verse 13 that now he could “teach transgressors your ways so that sinners will turn back to you.”  His experience of restoration gave him a calling to help others. Is God calling you to help others? Your story is God’s backdrop to show His grace.You don’t have to conjure up a feeling of forgiveness. Walk by faith in the forgiveness that is being freely offered to you and come forth fresh, clean, and whiter than snow.